Jasmine Wallis, Mindless Mag
Everybody experiences feeling anxious in their lives as it is a natural human response to feeling threatened. Whether that’s feeling nervous before a big test or publicly speaking, it is a momentary uneasy feeling that dissipates the moment the threat is over. For a person who has an anxiety disorder, this is not the case. They may not have a specific trigger that they can identify and move past, but their experience of anxiety is a constant process which can prevent them from handling the stresses of day-to-day life.
Growing up, I loved musical theatre and when I turned 9, I decided to take part in real stage productions. Although I have two left feet, singing and acting always gave me so much joy. But 1 in 4 people experience a mental health problem every year and when I turned 14 the symptoms of anxiety had begun for me. I was preparing for another show backstage when I felt a tightness in my chest, an overwhelming feeling of sickness and found it difficult to breathe. This was the first of many panic attacks throughout my young adult life.
How to cope with panic attacks
– Breathing exercises
– Focus on your senses. What can you feel? What can you smell? This allows you to reconnect with your body and blocks out any unhelpful surroundings.
– It is important to be open and honest about your experience of panic attacks with someone you trust.
– Try to locate what it was that triggered your panic attack and instead of avoiding this situation in future, approach it with support. For example, if you have social anxiety and have experienced a panic attack at a party, do not stop yourself from ever going to another party as this will feed your anxiety. Instead go with someone you trust and who knows how to support you through these moments of panic.
Social Anxiety is an overwhelming fear of social environments; however, this doesn’t necessarily mean you are not a social person. I had plenty of friends and went to plenty of events with them, but I could never match their care-free attitude. I couldn’t understand how they were able to feel so sure in themselves and confident in their actions, meanwhile I was worrying constantly that I was being judged. So, when I moved to a new city on my own without the support of my friends and family back home, I was terrified.
Being Social with Social Anxiety
I am not a quiet person. In fact, many people have been surprised to learn I have a diagnosis of anxiety. The reason I say this is I think it’s important to understand there are many ways in which anxiety can present itself and there is not just one type of person it affects. Even famous names such as Ellie Goulding, Selena Gomez and Zayn Malik have come forward to share their experiences of anxiety and panic attacks. Just because someone presents themselves as a charismatic, confident person it does not necessarily mean they are not fighting a battle within.
I used to be the child who would get up and play the lead in front of the school. The child who would start up a conversation with a stranger on the plane. Always reminded of stories of how confident I was when I was younger, I longed to have that feeling back. Unfortunately, and I am sure this is the case for many people, the events of the global pandemic really set me back in my progress battling social anxiety. Due to the circumstances, I ended up living on my own for a total of 150 days. Living my own personal Groundhog Day with no social interaction, I began to feel anxious that this solitude would end, and I would enter back into social situations worse than ever before. I wasn’t completely wrong, but I decided I didn’t want to let my anxiety control me anymore.
There are many ways to push yourself outside of your comfort zone, but this can be extremely scary, so it is important to think to yourself; What is the worst thing that can happen?
As someone with anxiety, we usually catastrophize the situation and are stuck with a constant voice in our head telling us all the things that will go wrong. However, do these disasters usually happen? No.
Stepping Outside My Comfort Zone
For me, I decided the way to overcome my anxiety was to travel around Europe and stay in hostels where I had no choice but to immerse myself into new social situations. Everywhere I went I was surrounded by so many people, and I began to take comfort in how big the world really is. There are 8 billion people on this planet who all have their own lives to focus on, so why do I care so much about what other people think of me and let this affect my mental and physical wellbeing when I am only a tiny part of the population. Now, I’m not saying this was the cure to all my troubles, but it allowed me to be this genuinely self-assured, worry-free version of myself and I even found the confidence to sing again.
Although I understand travel is not a possibility for everyone, the principle still applies. It was not the action of travelling that helped improve my self-confidence, but by meeting a variety of new people from all different walks of life. This can be achieved anywhere around the world by pushing ourselves to do things we have always wanted to do but have allowed our anxiety to stop us from doing. It will always be uncomfortable at first but by riding through the physical and mental symptoms of anxiety, and meeting like-minded and accepting people, the fear will become less significant the next time you try something new.
