NoPanic

Author: millie.painter

  • Celebrating Progress (No Matter How Big or Small)

    By Amy Moore, Content Team Contributor

    Sometimes, for people with anxiety, activities that may seem so simple for everyone else, can feel impossible to accomplish. When I was a teenager, my anxiety became so debilitating that some days it was a struggle to leave the house. School, which had once been my favourite place in the world, became somewhere that it felt impossible to return to, so I spent a lot of time sitting in the car outside. It eventually became easier, and I went back to school, and those anxiety-riddled days became something that I would not talk about because I just felt so ashamed that something which should beso easy had become so difficult. So, although I had come such a long way from those days sitting in the car outside the school gate, I never really accepted that progress because I so desperately wanted to forget that time of my life had existed. 

    It is only as I’ve grown older that it’s become clear to me that struggling with these everyday things should definitely not be something to be ashamed or embarrassed of. I found that feeling that sense of embarrassment only made my anxiety worse as I would keep telling myself that other people did not feel like this, and that I was just being stupid. You’re not being stupid. Anxiety is something that is so difficult to fully understand unless you, yourself, have actually felt the tiresome effects that it can have on all aspects of life. And that is why I have started to celebrate anything and everything that takes me out of my comfort zone.  

    There is no achievement too big or too small to celebrate. For example, the dentist has always been a huge anxiety of mine, mostly because I really don’t like sitting in waiting rooms – the silence and the stillness is just fuel that gives me nothing to focus on except how anxious I am. That is why I have always brought someone with me to appointments because I was so convinced that if I had to attend alone then I would simply bolt out the door and not come back. But, for the first time, at the age of twenty, I had to attend the dentist on my own last week.  

    I won’t say that the experience was without anxiety, because it was most definitely present, but I managed it. And, for me, that was such an incredible achievement. So on my way back to the car, I treated myself to a coffee from the cute coffee shop next to the dentist, and it was the best coffee I have ever tasted. I want to make it clear that this kind of achievement is less about trying to prevent anxiety, and more about feeling the anxiety and telling yourself that you can do it. Sometimes, you just have to do it whilst being anxious. At the end of the day, trying to accomplish something is much better than simply believing that you can’t do it. You are capable of anything you set your mind to, even with anxiety. 

    I think it is so important to reward yourself for any and all steps you take outside of your comfort zone. There’s a tendency to always believe that you could have done more or that it was not worth the energy that was required, when in fact, every little step is a step in the right direction. Everyone is on their own journey and so there is no sense in comparing your own achievements with other people; reward yourself for simply trying, perhaps with your favourite dinner or some cake or even something as simple as taking a day to binge watch your favourite tv show. I find that having something to look forward to in the aftermath really helps to encourage me to try new things, which oftentimes, opens up doors to be attempting things that I never believed would have been possible when I was that young girl refusing to walk throughthe school gates.

    I want you to see for yourself that, although anxiety can be a horrific thing to experience, it is worth trying to push the boundaries of your comfort zone in any way that you can, even in the smallest of ways and using whichever techniques work best for you. Do what you need to do in order to take back control over your life, even if that means getting an over-priced drink from the coffee shop down the road! 

  • The Dreaded Deadline, and How to Deal With It

    By Paris Gill, Content Team Contributor

    The sun is finally out, it’s just about getting warmer, and summer is upon us. But for students like myself, May and June are the worst times of the year. The summer exam periodis an incredibly stressful time of year for those in education, and it can be very overwhelming swimming through the mounds of deadlines and anxiety-inducing situations of exams. Unfortunately, this stress doesn’t end come the end of education. The dreaded deadline pressures are something that extend wide into the future, in the workplace and life generally. 

    But fear not! There are some ways of reducing the tension and stress surrounding the exam and the deadline which I have discovered over the many years of practicing how to stay cool and calm before the summer holidays. 

    There are many different types of deadline anxiety, which I have personally noticed in myself and when talking to peers about what stresses them the most. Broadly, these consist of: 

    • 1. Anxiety around the importance of a deadline
    • 2. Anxiety because of many deadlines at the same time
    • 3. The anxiety of feeling unprepared

    1. The Importance of a Deadline

    In a school setting, your GCSEs and A-Levels/BTECs might be the most important exams you’ve ever sat. Goals for the future, either specifically getting into a college, university or workplace, or the general desire to do well, can make these exams seem incredibly daunting to sit. As a result, there may occur a form of self-sabotage with revision paralysis, where either nothing is going in or, being overwhelmed, you don’t even know where or how to start studying. 

    For after university or in a job setting, an important deadline may mean others rely on you to meet it with precision and accuracy, or your reputation may be held to the standards to which you complete your work. Again, the amount of pressure then put on this deadline is astronomical.

    There should therefore be an exercise of perspective when completing any sort of “important” deadline. By focusing on purely the task at hand and not worrying about the bigger picture, this at first may seem counter-intuitive. However, what I have realised by practicing this technique is that it draws mental energy away from worrying about the “domino effect”, and instead I can better direct my efforts to achieving this task or deadline as an isolated assignment. By focusing on the bite-sized chunks rather than the massive overthought-out picture of importance, the pressure on each individual task decreases.

    Additionally with exams, the phrase “what will be will be”, although cheesy, has kept me level-headed through a lot of stressful times! If, for example, I had done better in my Chemistry GCSE than I did, I might have taken it for A-Level and, like a lot of my friends, hated it and dropped it immediately! But because it didn’t initially work out like I wanted it to, in the end I was better off for it. 

    2. Too Many Deadlines

    Multiple exams or deadlines at the same time can become super overwhelming to balance and figure out how to prioritise and prepare for them. My dissertation and final project for a different module were due 2 days apart, and so I had to balance my spring holidays between doing both to an equally high standard, knowing they would influence my graduating grade. That put a lot of pressure on doing them both well and submitting them on time! 

    This is why I have sworn by a study timetable ever since my schoolyears. I now pride myself on good time management skills, but this is only through years of practice in balancing priorities and knowing where to direct my energy. With multiple coinciding deadlines, it’s really important to maximise efficiency and energy so you don’t get burnt out.

    Knowing how you work best can really help with this, exams or work deadlines. For example, if you can only focus on one thing at a time, allocate a couple days to each topic or project to fully immerse yourself in that task. On the other hand, if you need to do a little bit of everything, schedule a few different tasks to work on each day. 

    The length of time and time of day for productivity is also useful to figure out. The Pomodoro method, where you workfor 25 minutes and break for 5, can really help some people stay focused throughout the day. For me, however, I like to get carried away with work and not interrupt my flow, so turning off my phone and sitting in a library for a couple hours works better for me. I also study much better in the mornings, but a lot of students enjoy working late into the night – it depends on your preference!

    3. Feeling Unprepared

    Feeling unprepared or out of time is usually my biggest anxiety surrounding an upcoming deadline. As a busy student or someone with a lot of different work tasks, a deadline with a short amount of prep time, or a task which has become bogged down with the millions of other things to complete, can cause anxiety and frustration upon actually reaching the deadline. 

    This feeling was increasingly common this year when preparing for job interviews, particularly moving to a field I’m not currently in. As an English student who was interviewing for legal jobs, being the only non-law student at assessment days, or not having full access to certain resources, added an extra level of imposter syndrome to these already-stressful environments.

    My advice for feeling unprepared isn’t to prepare 1000% and panic if you haven’t, but allow yourself the grace to lean on what you know and admit what you don’t. No one is perfect, but admitting this will allow you to take some of the pressure off of the deadline and just prepare what you can. You’ll find that with a calmer attitude and less pressure on being perfect, you might just do better than you think!

  • Movement: Moving More for our Mental Health

    By Ruth Cooper-Dickson, Patron.

    There is always a focus on mental health in May, Mental Health Awareness Week in the UK, and Mental Health Awareness Month in the US. This year the theme for the UK has been set by the Mental Health Foundation as Movement: Moving More for our Mental Health.  It is a relatable topic for all, and we must look beyond simply thinking of movement as exercise such as the gym, running or sports. Adults now sit on average for 9 hours a day, which is not healthy and can create a whole host of physical health risks. The pandemic saw anincrease in hybrid and remote working, this could mean the usual commute to the office for many disappeared, so we need to remember to factor in the breaks to step away from our desks. For people that do commute to their workplace, the busyness of the working day may not allow them to step away from the desk to stretch their legs. 

    Movement can be about how we take the stairs more, dance around our kitchen (a favourite of mine!), spend time in the garden or chase our children in the park, it does not have to be about the idea of sports or fitness. Finding something you love is key to engaging with movement. That has always been for me one of the biggest factors. Not many people know but I am a trained fitness instructor and during 2008-2009 I took a sabbatical from financial services and retrained. I used to teach lots of different styles of gym classes. My favourites were the aqua aerobics with the more elderly class members and my community hall aerobics classes. Why? Because I saw how those classes connected people on a deeper level. It was their social time, their ‘me-time’ each week. They didn’t have to show up in the most expensive outfits and they were not there to be the top of their fitness game. They came to move their body, laugh, and have some fun. I believe it was also down to the music. We know the positive impact that music can have on our mental health, I used to spend hours curating the perfect playlists for my classes, ensuring people felt engaged, motivated, and inspired, with songs they could joyously sing along to with their friends. I saw a stat this week in Runner’s World magazine from a recent academic study, that 78% who say they exercise even when it’s done alone helps to combat feelings of loneliness, I used to witness that each week with my class members, the boost of movement to their mental health.

    Science shows that we feel better when we are physically active. The level of chemicals in the brain, such as serotonin, stress hormones and endorphins, change when you exercise. It helps the brain to process information more quickly and increase focus, memory, and brain functioning.

    Physical activity can teach the body not to overact to stress by engaging in safe exercise that raises our heart rate. Our brain begins to learn how to deal with the stress, helping our resilience. It can help to calm our stress response too, think about if you’re feeling intense emotions and you take yourself out for a walk, a jog, whatever it is to “clear your head”. Movement can also help to alleviate some of the symptoms of depression or anxiety. 

    I want to say there is a caveat here when we are unwell whether this is physically or mentally, living with a chronic health condition, or a disability it can make movement hard at times or not as accessible. At these times it can be frustrating to be told to move when we cannot. We can also give our body a hard time when it doesn’t want to move or feelsimpossible to motivate ourselves to get out of the front door. On those days it is important to extend the grace and compassion to meet ourselves where we are at, then next time we try again. Trying another approach, finding accessible support, people who can keep us accountable may be some of the ways to help us move forward with our physical activity goals. 

    My small challenge to you is what is the one way you will decide to move a little more in May to support your mental health?

  • Moving House and How to Help Ease Your Anxiety

    Hannah Parton, Content Team Contributor

    Most of us know, that moving house is a big and stressful process to go through, so it’s common for anxiety to often feel difficult to deal with. Moving house will happen to pretty much all of us at least once in our lives. Whether it’s the family moving house, moving away to university or moving in with a partner, it all feels very daunting and worrying; it’s a big lifestyle change!

    I’ve recently moved into a flat with my boyfriend and thought it could be a good idea to share a little about my experience and how I dealt with my anxiety during our moving process. 

    Our journey of getting our flat was long and very stressful to say the least, but it was so exciting! Having said that, throughout the process, I often found that my anxiety was difficult to manage. The combination of trying to carry on with life commitments like work and university, all whilstdealing with feeling anxious about the move a lot of the time, felt quite overwhelming. As a result, I often got quite upset and I sometimes lost sight of how this process was meant to be an exciting one.

    In the other parts of my life, I do certain things to help reduce my anxiety and I recognised that I should do the same for moving house!

    So, I started to do little things that helped calm my nerves and help keep the added anxiety at bay. I’m not going to lie, doing these things didn’t completely get rid of my anxiety, as moving house is a big thing and it’s natural and completely normal to feel a little stressed and worried. However, after doing these things, I felt a lot calmer about the process and was able to look forward to what was to come. Moving house shouldn’t be torture for your mental health!

    Below are two things I used, that helped a lot to reduce my anxiety and made me feel so much better about the move! I hope these recommendations can help you too if you’removing or if you’ve got a big lifestyle change coming up!

    1. Make To-Do Lists:

    There was so much to think about when organising for the move, feeling like there was a billion things to do, I’d often get myself quite worked up. I decided to start writing to-dolists and separating those things that needed doing into categories. All those thoughts of things that needed sorting, floating around in my head, I could then write down and physically see in an orderly fashion. 

    So, an example of a list I made was a packing list with each room as subsections. Then under each section I’d write down everything needing packing from/for that room, like the bathroom or kitchen. 

    Another useful tip is creating a separate list for things you don’t have or think you’ll need for the place you’re moving to. You can then add to this as you get to each room’s to-do list.

    I also had a list of important to-dos, these things being the non-negotiables that I had to get done. For example, sending off important documents or emails and I would write themdown in order of importance or date. Creating these lists, allowed me to plan strategically what needed doing and when, by ticking things off like a checklist, the sense of relief I would get after getting things done was an amazing feeling; a sense of accomplishment! Before I knew it, many things that had been going over and over in my head, causing me to feel unbelievably anxious, were then ticked off and done and dusted!

    2. Make use of the internet:

    Another part of moving that causes a lot of anxiety and worry is the prospect of living in a new place. Getting used to not only being in a new building but new area can make people feel very worried about moving. A tip that I found to help me,was utilising the internet to research the area I was moving to. I sussed out things like where the local amenities were andplanned what would be my routes to work and university. Little things like this helped to calm the nerves, as I could plan and prepare for life in the new area. I also used the internet for decoration and interior inspiration. I’d often look on social media for ideas and tips, so I can start creating ways of making my new house a proper home.

    I hope these two tips can help you with moving and hopefully can help calm those extra nerves! To those of you moving house or those of you with other big life changes coming up, best of luck, trust and enjoy the process!

  • Anxiety – How Do You Deal With Your Inner Boggart?

    Fiona Gee, Content Team Contributor

    While we can all agree that the less said the better about JK Rowling’s recent antics, the Boggart characters in the Harry Potter books have always stuck in my mind as a truly accurateand useful metaphor for anxiety which describe it in a way I have never seen elsewhere. 

    For the uninitiated, Boggarts are first introduced in the third book, Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azbakan:

    ‘ ‘So the first question we must ask ourselves is, what is a Boggart?’

    Hermione put up her hand.

    ‘It’s a shape shifter’, she said. ‘It can take the shape of whatever it thinks will frighten us most’.

    ‘Couldn’t have put it better myself’, said Professor Lupin, and Hermione glowed. ‘So the Boggart sitting in the darkness within has not yet assumed a form. He does not yet know what will frighten the person on the other side of the door. Nobody knows what a Boggart looks like when he is alone, but when I let him out, he will immediately become whatever each of us most fears.’’

    And so, to anxiety – or what I would describe as each of our own inner Boggarts, able to shape shift and appear in a variety of circumstances and permeate events throughout our lives – ranging from job interviews, to social situations, to travelling. In a world where we can’t just use the spell ‘Riddikulus’ and turn the Boggart’s form into something funny (as Harry and his friends did), how then does one deal with its shape shiftingability?

    One thing I have learned is that, because of its ability to shape shift, it’s often unrealistic to think that there is just one solution to anxiety. While there are obviously some over-arching therapies and treatments that can help in a general sense, actually, realising that different situations might require different approaches can often be key to improvement. 

    Take flying, for example – this is something that a lot of people feel anxious about (whether you suffer from anxiety more generally or not). I did not fly for the first time until I was an adult and by that time, I was certainly anxious about the experience such that I would have the typical sweating palms for take off and landing (and during any bout of turbulence) and would generally spend the entire time jumpy as hell, while urging time to move faster until we were back on the ground. 

    However, in recent years, I’ve seen a marked improvement in that to the point that last time, there were no sweating palms and for probably one of the first times in my life, the calm voice of logic was louder than my flight Boggart was. What’s my secret? Unfortunately this was probably down to nothing more than the fact I have flown more frequently in the past couple of years – which has in turn started to normalise the experience and left me feeling less anxious about it. 

    There is obviously a school of thought that effectively reproducing that approach in everyday life will help with all types of anxiety (ie by pushing yourself into situations that cause you anxiety, you will eventually become less anxious about them). In some cases this might work. The ultimate aim for many of us is to not miss out on experiences because of our anxiety. However, my own view is that that is unlikely to assist every form of anxiety – and learning to be ok with that is a big step forward. 

    Learning to understand that the Boggart is continually shape shifting and saying actually, sometimes it’s ok to remove myself from this environment, or to look at alternative jobs if the one I am in is causing me stress, or to not be friends with this person if they cause me stress  – or whatever it is – is surprisingly liberating and effective. It is possible that one of those things was the main source of anxiety in the first place and that as a result, anxiety levels then generally become more manageable. 

    Of course, it’s unlikely to disperse the Boggart completely, because that’s not how anxiety works – but hey – it might just mean there is one less shape for him to shift into…

  • Social Rejection

    By Chaima Kenache, Content Team Contributor

    For many young people anxiety is the byproduct of wanting to ‘fit in’ socially with others. Whether consciously or unconsciously, many of us have this innate desire to please or seem appealing to others. But why is this? Socially, why do the opinions of others, even strangers, mean so much?  The rise of social media platforms has exacerbated feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt within our population. A report by the ‘Pew Research Center’ revealed that 72% of young adults aged 18 to 29 use Instagram, with a significant portion of their time spent comparing themselves to others. Witnessing peer’s post their ‘perfect’ lives whilst garnering success and attention, may magnify our own insecurities and ignite this inferiority-complex where we see the need to compete and adjust our lives for the camera’s approval.

    Social media can encourage individuals to hide behind a false version of themselves, to fit in with the ideal, even though for the most time, their ‘role models’ are faking as well, creating an endless cycle of self-doubt and anxiety of meeting the standard. In addition, the curated and glamorised nature of social media often presents an idealised version of reality, fostering unrealistic standards of beauty, success, and popularity. Consequently, individuals may experience heightened anxiety as they strive to measure up to these unattainable ideals, perpetuating a cycle of insecurity and dissatisfaction about themselves and their external image. 

    School environments can also further reinforce feelings of anxiety and self-consciousness within individuals. An example of this is the teacher asking students to get into non-selected groups or pairs for an activity or project. This often can create a lot of fear and anxiety for those who do not recognise anyone in that specific class or environment. The fear of speaking up and getting rejected in front of those who you do not know very well can channel feelings of embarrassment, irritation and ultimately anxiety. In that brief, fleeting moment after the teacher has asked there class to get into groups, an individual needs to make a choice, either get up and ask to join a group and hope they say yes in order to avoid looking ‘lonely’ when everyone else inevitably finds a group or to stand their quietly hoping that no one has realised you’re working alone. As a student myself, a lot of the time the second option seems like the easier, safer option, yet by doing this, we are encouraging the avoidant behaviour , therefore increasing the likelihood of repetition in the future. This is because, in this scenario the joy of avoiding social rejection can act as a reward, so as a result we continue not asking to join to avoid feeling those negatively associated emotions of rejection and anxiety. (negative reinforcement)

    Asking to join someone’s group can seem like the end of the world when internal morale is low, an individual may find it hard to remember that they’re not being attacked nor judged in this situation.

    This same sort of fear is seen throughout the school experience, it could be a student not raising their hand in class, despite them knowing the correct answer or really struggling to understand something the teacher is explaining, it could be students behaving in a more disruptive and outlandish way to ‘impress’ and fit in with the ‘popular’ kids, it could be a student feeling insecure about the way they dress or a mark or disability. These are all different, individual scenarios, yet they all centre on one thing: The social approval of others and the fear of being rejected for being different, According to a study published in the ‘Journal of Abnormal Psychology’ researchers found that the fear of social rejection and the desire for social acceptance are significant predictors of anxiety disorders among young adults. The study, which surveyed over 1,000 participants, highlighted the detrimental effects of feeling disconnected or ostracised from social groups, such as not having a group to work with for a school activity/project. 

    There are ways to avoid feeling the pressure to conform to social norms and ‘fit’ in with the rest. First and most importantly, having a good healthy relationship with yourself elevates you and helps you to put situations into an honest perspective- instead of catastrophising the pressure of reaching out and speaking to those you don’t know, having good self-esteem and confidence within yourself helps you to feel more comfortable talking to other people, since you’re not looking for any sort of social approval and therefore social rejection doesn’t faze you nearly in the same way.

    Moreover, seeking out like-minded individuals or communities where we can feel accepted and valued can provide a supportive social network. These individuals can be found in family members, teachers, clubs or in finding a good branch (if we do not already have that) of friends whose morals align with ours, allowing us to be ourselves unapologetically. Engaging in open and honest communication with others and expressing feelings of insecurity or exclusion can also help bridge social divides and foster empathy and understanding. Finally, practising self-compassion and acknowledging that feelings of not fitting in are common and transient can help individuals navigate through moments of uncertainty with greater resilience and perspective.

  • The Importance of ‘Doing it Anyway’

    By Craig Soutar, Content Team Contributor

    Regular readers of our articles will have seen our recent posts highlighting the new book ‘And how does that make you feel’, by Josh Fletcher (read more here), past sufferer turned psychotherapist specialising in anxiety disorders. As I sat down to compose a new article for the No Panic blog, it was thinking about Josh that reminded me of how important it can be, in recovering from anxiety, to rack up ‘did it anyways’.

    Have you heard of a ‘did it anyway’ ? Does it sound like something a child would do when they are told not to? Well in some ways, it’s not dissimilar, though this is not about rebelling against your parents, but instead against the distorted messages that anxiety is sending you. 

    ‘The anxiety cycle’

    For any of you who have already experienced or read about Cognitive Behaviour therapy, you may be familiar with the concept that anxiety is maintained by a vicious cycle. It looks something like this:

    One of the key tricks to improving your relationship with anxiety is to become familiar with this cycle and start to see if you can spot it playing out, before finally looking for actions you can take to interrupt that cycle. 

    ‘Changing your behaviour for anxiety’

    In this article, I am going to focus on the ‘Change of behaviours’ step. In the example above, the anxious behaviour was not getting on a bus. This supported all the anxious thoughts, feeling sna symptoms which suggested the bus was dangerous. Unfortunately, not getting on the bus has consequences. Not only did it stop them getting to where they were going, but it also reinforced to the nervous system that it was right, after all, if it wasn’t right, why would we have avoided getting on the bus – it must indeed have been dangerous. 

    ‘Doing it anyway’

    So thinking about the anxiety cycle, how could we break it using behaviours, applying a ‘do it anyway’ mindset? .. top points for anybody who has guessed ‘getting on the bus’. 

    Sounds terribly simple doesn’t it. You may even be thinking ‘duh, do you think I don’t want to get on the bus?’. Alas, often the right things to do in life are not easy … taking medicine is rarely fun, but the long-term benefits are generally worth it. In the case of the anxiety cycle, don’t assume that in suggesting this action, that a therapist or no panic staff member does not realise how difficult it is. We understand that it meanschallenging all your natural instincts, and takes immense bravery, but also be assured that just like medicine, the long-term benefits are worth it. 

    Presumably having summoned all your bravery and taken the bus ride, you are now free of anxiety, you’ve beaten it, right? People often think if they have ‘broken’ the cycle, they must immediately feel fine. However, your nervous system does not have an on/off switch – think of it more like a dimmer. After all, from your nervous system perspective, you’ve got on the bus and ok this one time you appear to have been safe, but it can’t assume that means you will be fine every time, so it will continue to present some level of challenge to you. However, over time, if you keep getting on that bus, your nervous system continues to update its records and adapting it’s response – that’s how over time, you find newer better responses. 

    ‘What behaviours are worth challenging?’

    Commonly when raising this topic, people assume this is all about big events, like getting on planes, or speaking in public, but it applies at every level of your recovery. It can be useful to sit with a pen and paper. Look for things in your life that either you used to enjoy or want to do now, but don’t do, especially if the reason is something like…. ‘because it will make me feel anxious’, ‘because I won’t be able to cope’, ‘because I will die’, ‘because I will go mad’.

    You might be surprised to find you are avoiding simple things like walking down their street because they might bump into somebody and ‘…couldn’t cope with that’. This is why people who anxiously avoid tend to find their world gets smaller and smaller. Below are some examples in a few different categories to get you started, but see what you can notice:

    Big ChallengesSocial ThingsPhysical challengesLifestyle challenges
    Avoid getting on a plane, because I might panic… Avoid meeting friends, because I’ll do something stupidAvoid going to the gym, because my anxiety ridden body can’t do that Avoid drinking caffeine, because it will set off my anxiety
    Avoid applying for that new job, because the nerves will make me faint Avoid going to an event in public, because people will be watching meAvoid going for a walk, because the exertion may bring on a panic attachAvoid watching the news, because I can’t handle anything negative just now
     Avoid going to the supermarket because I might make a scene Avoid doing your relaxation practice, because I might notice anxiety and I can’t face it 

    Next steps

    Hopefully you’ve understood the part that avoiding behaviours can play in your anxiety disorder and how ‘doing it anyway’ can be one of the strongest tools you have in re-educating your nervous system that you are fine and you can cope. 

    Try the exercise of identifying behaviours you are adapting for your anxiety. Once you’ve got a list, pick one or two and set yourself a goal to challenge them. You don’t have to do everything at once and you don’t have to go straight to the biggest thing. Also, remember doing it will still be scary, but that’s ok and you will be fine. If you need support remember our helpline is there to talk it through, open every day between 10am – 10pm on 0300 7729844. You could also consider signing up to our 1-1 mentoring service while you work through it. So please remember to be kind to yourself and continue to know that this will pass. 

  • Helping Employees Manage Stress

    By Natasha Devon, Patron

    In my experience, people will broadly have one of three responses when asked about stress. There are the people who claim never to experience it (usually for reasons of associating it with ‘weakness’). There’s the other extreme – people who believe it is their default state and somehow a badge of honour. And then you have the rest of us. Those who try to avoid stress whenever possible but find it difficult because the world is an increasingly stressful place. 

    My view on stress changed when I undertook Mental Health First Aid England instructor training, back in 2017. We were shown a graphic of a ‘stress bucket’ and taught that every time we encounter something frustrating, anger-making or panic-inducing, a little stress will flow into it. The aim is not to prevent this (because that would be impossible) but to regulate the total amount of stress sloshing about in the bucket by regularly draining it, via a metaphorical tap. 

    Turning on your stress bucket tap isn’t something to do in response to feeling stressed. It’s a daily, preventative measure – kind of like brushing your teeth. Generally speaking, there are three really good ways to do it. The first is physical activity, the second creativity and the third relaxation. Today, I take time to do something that fits into one of these three categories as often as I can – I aim for a total of one hour every day. 

    Of course, there are still times when I feel overwhelmed. If there’s one, giant thing taking up lots of space in my bucket then the smaller things seem less surmountable. That’s why during the pandemic, when we all had this enormous source of worry, many of us lost the ability to deal with the smaller trials and tribulations of life. I have a friend who copedremarkably well with the life-threatening pandemic sweeping the world’s population, but during one lockdown cried for three hours because she put a red sock in her white wash. That’s classic stress bucket overflow. 

    Whilst daily turning on the tap isn’t a perfect solution for every scenario, it’s a good baseline rule. The challenge for many, though, is finding the requisite time and energy. 

    Recently, I’ve been visiting more work places with my campaign Where’s Your Head At. I’ve been challenging employers to ask themselves whether a working parent in their organisation would realistically have the time and money to practice this vital form of self-care. If not, what could they do to facilitate? 

    Work circumstances can, of course, hugely increase amount of stress flowing into the bucket. In his (brilliant) book the Wellbeing Toolkit, Andrew Cowley cautions that wellbeing should not be conflated with self-care. You can’t offset a hugely unmanageable work load with a few cut-price yoga sessions, for example. 

    Yet often, when employers ask staff to anonymously submit suggestions for reducing workplace stress the requested changes are relatively simple. It could be introducing a rule that no one sends work emails after a certain time of day. It could be providing free gym memberships for employees. It could be making it common practice for everyone to leave their desks and take a decent lunch break. It could be introducing quiet areas or ‘chill out zones’ where staff can go when they need half an hour to think, or restore. 

    And evidence shows the return on that investment will likely be huge. Stress not only increases the chances of developing both physical and mental illnesses, it can also reduce an individual’s ability to problem solve, make decisions and think creatively. 

    A thriving business requires productive and present staff and stress is the enemy of that aim. 

    Find out more about Natasha’s work at www.natashadevon.com

  • Why a Digital Detox can Reduce your Stress Levels

    Dr Charlotte Armitage, Founder of No Phones at Home CIC

    Smart devices are part and parcel of everyday life for the majority of people. There are insidious in every element of our lives from the professional to the personal. Whether it’s checking emails, paying for parking, ordering food, tracking our energy use, banking, in education or the plethora of social media platforms used to communicate with friends and loved ones. 

    In today’s world, by the age of 12, 97% of children will own a smart device, and a child born today who lives to the age of 90, is expected to spend around 25 years of their lives looking at a smart screen. 

    Yet the impact that all this screen time is having on mental health, child development, relationships and psychological wellbeing has only recently started to come to light as more research and data is published. 

    There is a growing concern amongst mental health professionals, doctors, teachers and parents about the negative impact smart devices are having on our mental health and psychological wellbeing. Much like we experienced withprocessed food and smoking, we are now in place in societywhen the need to raise education and awareness on smart device use is required to make more informed decisions for the benefit of our health and wellbeing.

    Smart Devices and Stress  

    Being on a smart device for long periods of time can contribute to stress for several reasons. 

    One of the main issues is around the constant information overload faced with the pervasive nature of the devices in our lives. Constant exposure to notifications, emails, social media updates, and news alerts can overwhelm your brain with information, leading to cognitive overload and increased stress levels.

    The ‘always on’ nature of our lives by being constantly connected to work, social networks, and news, makes it difficult to disconnect and relax. The boundaries are blurredbetween work and personal life, leading to increased stress and burnout.

    Other ways in which devices can contribute to stress levels include: 

    • Disrupted sleep, with the blue light emitted by smart device screens interfering with the production of melatonin, a hormone that regulates sleep. Using devices before bedtime can disrupt your sleep patterns, leading to fatigue and increased stress.

    • Reduced physical activity due to spending too much time on smart devices leading to a sedentary lifestyle, which is associated with various health issues, including increased stress levels. Lack of physical activity can also negatively impact mood and mental well-being.

    • Excessive use of smart devices can also lead to addiction-like behaviours, where you feel compelled to constantly check your device for updates and notifications. This dependency can contribute to stress and feelings of anxiety when you’re unable to access your device.

    To mitigate these effects, it’s important to establish healthy boundaries with your smart devices, such as setting designated times for device use, practicing digital detoxes, and prioritising real-life interactions and activities. Finding a balance between technology use and offline activities can help reduce stress and improve overall well-being.

    Digital detox to alleviate stress

    Creating phone-free time can help alleviate stress for several reasons. Establishing phone-free time reinforces boundaries between work and personal life, allowing you to disconnect from work-related stressors during leisure time. 

    Enforcing a digital detox, by taking breaks from your phone allows your brain to rest from the constant barrage of information and stimuli. This reduction in cognitive load can help alleviate feelings of overwhelm and stress.

    Setting boundaries around phone use can also empower you to take control of your time and prioritise activities that nourish your well-being.

    Simple changes you can make: 

    – Turn your phone onto aeroplane mode overnight to limit the distractions. Or think about removing the phone from the bedroom. This can take away the habit of scrolling before bed and as soon as you wake up.  

    – Establish a morning routine that avoids the mobile phone, and only check it once you’ve completed your routine. 

    – Consider taking a social media break. Logout or delete the apps to create some comparison free space. Learning more about social media platforms and how the algorithms work can also help you make more informed choices when you are using apps. 

    – Actively seek phone-free activities. Head out into nature, meet up with friends and family to get creative, pick up a book. Engage in other activities for leisure and enjoyment instead of scrolling or gaming. 

    – Log how you feel when using your smart device, and how much time you’re spending on it. People are often surprised by the amount of time they spend on their devices and correlate it with their mood and feelings. 

    We live in a digital era with smart devices playing an increasingly pivotal role in education, work and leisure. In order for us mitigate the negative implications of this increased digital-heavy world, we need to create phone-free time to allow  much-needed breaks from the demands and distractions of technology, fostering relaxation, mindfulness, and better overall mental health.

    No Phones at Home is a CIC committed to raising awareness and education around the impact of smart device use. Head to the website for a free planner guide to help carve out dedicated phone-free time in your busy schedules, along with further advice on healthy smart device use.

  • Anxiety, Emetophobia, and the Isolation that Accompanies it

    Amy Moore, Content Team Contributor

    Emetophobia is defined as “the extreme fear of vomiting” and it is something I have been learning to cope with since I was twelve years old. Yet, it wasn’t until I was eighteen that I found out it was something that many people struggle with. 

    It’s important to realise that panic attacks can come in all different forms. For so long, I felt like a fraud because my own panic attacks did not mimic those that I had seen in the media, where someone would struggle to breathe or would seemingly become unaware of their surroundings. My panic attacks always began with sudden extreme nausea and would end up with me physically vomiting. If anything, I became far too aware of my surroundings and always felt the need to get out of whatever situation I was in. I know now that this was the start of my avoidance behaviour towards anything that I believed would provoke my anxiety, but at the time, I thought I was being rational and responsible in thinking that no one would want me there because I couldn’t control my anxiety.  

    I became so terrified of having a panic attack and being sick that I missed so much of my life – most days I couldn’t force myself to go to school, I stopped seeing my friends, and on my worst days, it was a struggle to even leave the house. I could barely eat because I was so worried about being sick, and it was difficult just to sit in a room with other people; I would spend my time planning how I would leave if I suddenly felt nauseous. It was debilitating. I was twelve years old and I felt like my life would be like this forever. Very quickly, it became a cycle that I couldn’t get out of: I’d wake up, feel sick, be sick, end up not eating which only made me feel more ill, and spend the day at home dwelling on how awful I felt. Panic attacks were so common that it was as if I had scheduled my whole life around them. I stopped doing absolutely everything because this fear had such tight control over me. Above all, I felt so lonely because I pushed everyone away. I didn’t want anyone to see me. 

    For anyone who is struggling through something similar to this, I want to tell you that you’re not alone. Anxiety can be so incredibly isolating, especially when you feel so ill that all you want to do is hide. But, there are people nearby who will be willing to listen and help you through it on the days when the most simple things just feel impossible. If you need to talk to somebody, you can call the No Panic helpline on 0300 7729844, open every day between 10am and 10pm. I want you to know that you can get through it. It also does not matter how long it takes you. Every single day is a new day to try again. It might feel like it will never get better, that you’ll be stuck here forever, but things do get easier – I know that from experience. 

    To try and break the isolation I had put myself in, I had to start with small things, like going out on a walk with someone. At the start, it was so difficult, but I found that being outdoors really helped me to feel less trapped and walking meant that I could focus on something other than how sick I felt. I realised that I needed distractions to stop me from thinking about how anxious I was and to stop hyper-focusing on every single sensation in my body. I needed to get out of my head and back into the world, one small step at a time. I also found that putting time limits on things helped, saying that I had to be home at a certain time so that I knew exactly how long I would be socialising for. It increased my confidence so much that I really started to enjoy seeing people again, something that at one point in my life, I thought was impossible.  

    Emetophobia used to be something that felt like it controlled everything I did. Now, it’s more of a passing thought that I can cope with because I have realised that the happiness I have when I am socialising and seeing my friends is worth far more than the fear and anxiety surrounding being sick. That’s not to say that every day is easy, far from it, but I have chosen to take it one day at a time, which I find makes it much more manageable. 

    To anyone who is reading this, I hope this has given you the hope that things can get better. It just has to start with you. No one else has any control over you getting your life back. People will support you on the journey there, but you have to be the one leading the way. That may seem utterly terrifying, but it is truly liberating. You can go at your own pace, in your own time, and eventually, you may be exactly where you want to be.